Home Practice for the hesitant Yogi

I admit, I am a little bit of a home practice pusher. If you have ever been in one of our yoga circles, you will hear me talking about "your home practice" as if it is a given -- obvioulsy we ALL have a home practice! And then, when you're that student that really WANTS to have a home practice, but can't quite get STARTED, it can feel a little overwhelming. 

There's nothing like a true story to boost our confidence. So, here is a wonderful story from a student about her experience bringing her yoga practice home:

"I need a teacher or a video, or some visual to guide me through what I am suppose to be doing.  Well, yesterday when I got home, the weather was so beautiful and I was feeling so grateful, I ran upstairs and changed into "yoga wear" and went out on my patio in the sun and started doing every yoga pose I could think of - just random, no flow really.  I found myself smiling from ear to ear with such a grateful heart I just kept moving into different poses for about 25 minutes.  It was so fabulous and uplifting!"

I love this story, becuase it highlights the main issue most of us have about a home practice (where should I START?!) and also lets us see a beautiful solution to that block. 

And, if you need just a little bit more guidance:

\ Trust your body. Most of the time, our body knows what it wants. When we’ve been sitting for a long time, we want to get up and walk, when we’ve been hunched over, we want to stretch the shoulders back and open the heart. See if you can tune in and let your body move you into a good stretch, keeping yourself loose and open.

\ Trust your breath. As breath is the foundation of every movement in yoga, so breath is the center of your being in the world. When in doubt, tune in to your breath. One small step towards bringing yoga into your daily life? Use reminders such as red lights, the sound of a bell, the words “thank you,” etc, to stop and take 5 full breaths.

\ Trust yourself. Start with any poses you remember. Keep building from there and you may be amazed at how easily you begin to expand your home practice. Bring any questions to class and allow the support of the yoga circle to nurture your individual process.

A few practical tips: 

\Try http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/finder/browse_categories for user-friendly, detailed explanations of your favorite poses. 

\As much as possible, try to set aside time where you will be uninterrupted. Light a candle, play meditative music, or in some other way signal that you are taking time for yourself. 

\Bring savasana into your daily routine. As you lie down to sleep each night, scan your body to notice any places where you may be holding tension, stress, or emotional weight from the day. As you notice each spot with the inhale, breathe and release it with the exhale. Transition into smooth belly breaths and drift off in this relaxed state.

On Panic, part 2: Note to myself when I panic

{Nancy Eaton, Out of the Deep}

This will pass.

There is no need to push away or abandon Body.

Body knows just what to do.

No matter what happens, stay in your Body.

It may be extreme, intense, and never-ending, but it WILL pass.

There is more ease than struggle in this life. More happiness, more contentment than struggle. 

Don’t blame yourself. If you do, you also need to take credit for all the good in your life, too, which we’ve already agreed far exceeds the struggle. 

Don’t distract: breathe, shake, cry. Move, imagine, speak or create from the experience. 

Ask Panic: what is holding my energy right now? Shame? Guilt? Terror? Hold it up to see. 

This is your own experience, it doesn’t need to be explained to anyone else to make it valid. 

Your Tribe is all around you – lean on them! Don’t worry about how it looks. It looks fucking brave – that’s how it looks. It looks like you went HAM on Panic – claimed it, rode it, yelled “help!”, leaned into it and listened with a steady and intent gaze. 

When it passes, let  it  go. There could be more, but don’t keep the company of vigilance – in your mind or in your body. 

I love you. You are so brave. 

Panic, part 1

Some ideas about handling panic attacks in the moment: 

1. Put your hand over your forehead (like you're taking your temperature). This helps to bring more bloodflow to the forebrain, and away from what is still activated: the hindbrain. The amygdala, which is the area of the brain that recognizes threat and acts in self-preservation is what is triggered, neurologically, during a panic attack. 
2. If possible, find someone to be with you, to support you in whatever way may arise. If panic attacks are common for you, find a person or two that will be able to be with you in body or on the phone, should the need arise. Here is an excellent list of things to do to support someone having a panic attack (have them read it now, so they’re at the ready to support you in this way): http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Breaking-the-Cycle-of-Anxiety
3. If you can, listen and trust the mindbody to unwind itself. Move or rest or breathe or whatever your body asks for. Try not to let your brain get involved in trying to analyze: this is key. Bring awareness to the sensations in your body and let go of resistance to movement/ shaking/ or stillness. 
4. You are healing each second. Your body is wise and knows just what to do: trust it, put your brain in the backseat and listen for what will support your body. It’s like when the smoke detector goes off when you burn a pizza. It's just like that. 
5. You are safe. You are supported. You are loved. 

“Let everything happen to you

beauty and terror

Just keep going

No feeling is final” 

–    Rainer Maria Rilke

Some wonderful resources:

Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score

Henry Emmons, The Chemistry of Calm

http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Breaking-the-Cycle-of-Anxiety

Image: Ghost by Lucian Olteanu

The Altar Within

More than a decade ago, during a rich and expansive time in my life, I scored the chance to play with art materials after some extended time of organic movement and dance. The result was this lady. She’s seen some wear and tear and has been stuffed with the children’s artwork under a bed in the attic. She is an image that came from a hearty desire to carry what I had been experiencing in circles around altars with wise and courageous souls. I just wanted there to be less discrepancy between what I was experiencing and my natural state of being – communicating, holding space, opening – within the circles, and the rest of my life. I wanted to carry the “altar within.”

It’s been so many years since then and many experiences, many changes in path, many deepenings, dark nights, and heady days. Through to this day, I circle up as often as I can. And I am still and always working to erase the line between circle and every-thing-else.

Perhaps what’s been surprising for me in all this is that the circle is still necessary and that the blurring of line between circle and every-thing-else will never mean the lack of a need for carving out kairos – sacred time. The sulfur of the struck match, the stones, statues, fabrics, and candlelight that mark this sacred center, that step outside of time will always be necessary for me. The simple act of setting down the altar is enough to once again wed the rocky world to its moorings. Just like the tree woman in the picture, I need the deep grounding of the earth to reach ever higher, both deepening and unfolding: a perfect marriage of masculine and feminine.

Nowadays, there are many more ways in which I can be called away from center. We are a homeschool family: three kids, three cats and two working parents. I am part of a community of homeschoolers, community of friends, a work community, a church community and the culture of our home. Each of the other family members has her or his own communities each is responsible to as well. It becomes so easy for me to be scattered in a million ways: pleasing every obligation and grasping at each opportunity. Instead, I ask myself, how can I reach out from, instead of reaching away from this rich, sacred center?

I am really lucky, actually. Some of my communities – the yoga circles that I teach, some church celebrations, and even some sacred play with friends, all take place around the glowing flame of a center altar. Even so, this summer I found myself in deep and troubling waters. The center seemed far, even when I was in circle. The mess of my internal world seemed so jagged and wretched that the altar was obscured by my own dark veil. I was in the circle, I was even leading the circle most of the time, but I couldn’t access the center. Sometimes, it was just too hard. The grief of losing refuge in a place that has always been healing was agonizing.

Slowly, what I have realized (although it is still very much a practice for me) is this: I have to welcome myself into the circle. No matter if I am a participant (I forgot: I always am!) or facilitating. I want to welcome in all of me, in the way in which I would welcome in any dark, suffering bits of my students, in the way that I would hold the sweet aching hearts of my children in hard times. I want to welcome myself just that way. And so, maybe the line blurs the other way and a bit of every-thing-else begins to flow towards the altar.

And so, the practice continues. I think I will light a little candle right now. Because I’m welcome. Right now. Just as I am.

Namaste, 
Amy

Intentional Moms Yoga Circle

“I love this circle. I love it because in the beginning I'm asked what I need today- physically, emotionally, spiritually. Hardly anyone ever asks me what I need!” – Suzette N.

About 5 years ago, I gazed out on a circle of yogis, deep in the throes of savasana and a thought came through bold as anything: “Wow. If anyone needs this, it’s homeschool moms!” Shortly after that, the first Homeschool Moms Yoga Circle was formed. 

"Attending IMYC gives me space to consciously connect with the woman in me, and the women who surround me. It is a much needed deep breath of reflection and peace. IMYC also reminds me of the continuing strength of my body and my appreciation for it." -Diane R.

This brave group of mommas came together to connect with their breath, with each other, and to relax away some of the very real stress of walking an intentional mothering path. We feasted together afterwards and the bonds swelled there, too, relief heavily threaded through the conspicuous laughter and tears.

“I feel nourished and rejuvenated afterwards, like I've given myself a wonderful gift!” – Cardinal L.

A couple of years ago, and after having brought this idea to the group, we decided to expand the circle, re-christening it as the Intentional Moms Yoga Circle.  Because, we felt, what mom doesn’t need this?

“The circle offers a much more gentle way of being with women; a whole different way than I knew growing up and even into adulthood.  There is no judgment or competition. I feel genuinely cared for and accepted for exactly who I am.” – Jess I.

In these years, the circle has moved several times, having gathered in a (master!) bedroom-cum-studio, in a river-side studio, amongst stuffed, fez-topped lions, and now: at Authentic. Our home, finally. And with this homecoming, the circle has begun to be it’s own living thing: arms that we step gratefully and graciously into each month. Jess came to our circle (how could she have ever NOT been part of it?!) and she and I do our best to facilitate a deep relief for body, mind, heart, and soul.

“My body is challenged by the yoga work, and later always feels better. My spirit feels nurtured and grounded by the spiritual and deep play components. I also feel happy and renewed after eating and socializing with everyone after the yoga piece is finished. It's perfect that this is a circle, because the experience feels very whole to me. It meets me on all levels: physical, emotional, spiritual and social.” – Suzette N.

Ultimately, my hope is that the circle serves, that it somehow midwives continual healing for the moms and for all the children, families and communities to which they offer their love and gifts.  

Please join us! Find out more about May's circle here. 

Namaste,

Amy

Moon Tribe Yoga Circle

       “Who is She?

       She is a daughter. She is a best friend. She is a pocketful of light. She is a spark of    something good, getting brighter; a dream grown large; the right thing at the right time… She wakes with anticipation. She finds new hills to climb. And everyone agrees that the very fact of her in the world means there is still so much good to come.

       Who is She? She is me. She is you. I am Her.” 

                                                                              

                                                                                        – From “I am Her” by M. H. Clark

Because I am a homeschool mom, I have the gift of spending time with lots of kids, lots of different ages, gifts, and personalities in community. I get to have conversations with two-year-olds and fifteen-year-olds, wee girls, big boys, young women and men. Also, lots and lots of moms and some dads.  I just love this side effect of homeschooling, because I get to have real connections with all these kids who hang out with me in this weave of community. 

Over the last few years, the moms and I have created a rich and nurturing circle in which we are able to bare and be borne.  It’s a yoga circle, but it’s become so much more. One mom described it like this:

“Imagine....a dimly lit room with an immaculate altar adorned with candles galore and 15-20 women in a close intimate circle moving together, meditating together, finding peace together through yoga...individual, partner, and community yoga poses. Connecting deeply. Circling even closer through…ritual. Women pouring out their hearts, opening up to the possibility of healing, of receiving, of being, of loving themselves. And then we close with three heart felt OMs and the circle continues with feasting and closeness as our conversations remain on a very deep and empowering level. Women connecting and feeling heard.”

And then the wondering began. Could this kind of offering be made for our young women, for our not-a-girl-not-yet-a-woman, maiden, girl children?  

The answer, of course, is Yes! This circle has certainly been gestating long before it came into consciousness for us grown women. These girls are ready for this! This is their circle: Moon Tribe Yoga Circle!

If you are a mom or an aunt or a friend of a young woman, age 10-17, and you would have “loved to have this kind of circle when I was young” – invite her! She can choose to say yes or no. The circle will always remain open.

More info here.

Namaste,

Amy

Letting the Pendulum Swing

Pendulum

“It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking the holidays are about giving and receiving presents or attending parties, but it’s really small, quiet acts of gratitude that cultivate connection.” –Brené Brown

pen·du·lum

ˈpenjələm,ˈpendyə-/

noun

1.     
a weight hung from a fixed point so that it can swing freely backward and forward.

Traditionally, and, by that I mean over the last few thousand years, this time of year represents a season of turning in, quieting, as the pendulum swings freely from the brightest, virile days of summer to the darkest, quietest days of winter.  Our ancestors relied on this rhythm to ensure the continuation of life: plant, grow, harvest, rest. We still need this rhythm to enable health in our bodies, in our families, and in our communities.

What I often observe, in my yoga circles, in my friends’ and family’s lives, really rides to the other end of the pendulum. What I see, even more than the physical doing, doing, doing of gift buying, decorating, parties, recitals, increased work load etc, etc, is the mental equivalent: “If I just give the perfect gift, throw the perfect party, have the perfect outfit, make the perfect cookie, have the most meaningful encounter with a salvation army bell ringer, then I will feel happy/satisfied/blessed/enough.”  This is not necessarily something to change outside of our selves, although that may follow, but rather an internal downshifting.

Recently, it seems I’m having a recurring conversation with students and potential students around their experiences with “hot yoga” or “power yoga” or P90x yoga – it seems this lack of balance is even creeping into the realm of yoga exercise. One reviewer noted that in the P90x version of yoga exercise, “savasana (the deep relaxation and integration that seals each yoga practice) is included, but only lasts one minute, possibly because that is the longest (the instructor) can bear to stop talking.”

My hope is that we can free the pendulum again to swing in the direction of balance: in our yoga offerings, in our families, and in our minds. Can we allow the momentary discomfort of shifting to neutral while we give our bodies a chance to breathe, our minds a chance to quiet, and our hearts a chance to rest? This so that we can turn ever inwards towards the small, tenacious shard of light which is our soul.

“Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.” –Yogi tea bag